Perhaps grim Reapers would be there  - like a cloaked identity with a long scythe present to collect this life with diminished account credentials, ready to visit the next life due for its time!

What would they do with an old soul?  - presuming if I were actually old! I mean how do I, or any one for that matter, would know that now I am old enough to go? No one knows how much recharge they have got in their lifetime warranty cards! We are just getting to spend it with every day and every second  - in a way we want, where we want and with a strong belief I AM DOING IT! 

Anyways, getting back to being old! Would I be surrounded by my kids, grand kids, holding my hand - assuming now it's time to say final goodbye! That's the common Indian family melodrama expectation - further fuelled by Bollywood. Would I be loved, and cheered for being me! Would I be cherishing my earned relationships or still haunted by so many words untold, so many people left to be hugged and appreciated and thanked! Still longing to have that final kiss, final meeting of the eyes communicating love and saying “Hey! Waiting for you up there! Come Soon!” Ah! Ok! Leave that ‘Come Soon’ part! 

I dont know if there would be still some of those whom I would not like to see even on that ‘Other’ side of the world at any cost.

Still without knowing when that last moment would be  - I would like to be still the same person I have shaped to be! Definitely not a cribbing interfering old hag but a tall smart ‘Budhiya’ donning a freshly drycleaned designer cotton saree ( on a body with an erect spine), some dyed and some grey hair meticulously tied in a bun, with a pristine pearl string round the neck and an old titan watch in polished manicured hands. Too materialistic to die? Still I want it that way! Atleast a lot better than the dependent old person stuck to a bed troubling everyone with their nursing, fear of infection and increasing medical bills! 

I want to go laughing heartily, chasing kids, dancing out with old n young, exploring more places and trying some sky diving! 

As I celebrate my 41st birthday this month, and writing about how I wanna depart……, 

I wonder leaving the world of mortals,

and entering the equation of infinity

With a desire to achieve Shoonya

Will I really be at peace

With oneness

Of my consciousness 

With universal consciousness

Merging of Atman 

With Brahman

Floating around

Like a free cloud

Empty

Full of Sat Chit Anand (divine consciousness and bliss)

Yet

With no beginning....

And no end….

Attaining complete 

Shoonya!